Nosiness and Contentment

        Of these two, one is undesirable and the other desirable. The definition of nosiness is undue interest in the affairs of others; prying. The motivation here is not pure, so we must avoid wasting time being nosey about the affairs of others lest God is displeased. Contentment is feeling that you no longer lack anything after you already possess God. If you are still not happy with yourself or life, you are not happy with the Lord yet. 

God Makes the Big Difference

        Today I realize that Christ Jesus has made everything in life significant and meaningful for me; for this I am most grateful, not to mention a host of other much greater benefits or blessings. 

**Intention Over Execution

        Communion experience. I knew that my execution to be perfect was imperfect, but my intention to be perfect was good enough for the Lord and saved my day.

**A Question We Must Respond To

        We are all sinners and only God our creator can take away (forgive) our sins to make us clean again. Do we want to remain in sin and die with sins unforgiven or take care of them before we die? We must respond to this simple but critical and no-nonsense question before we die, the sooner the better.

***Complete Abandonment to God!

        The desire to be a saint or a martyr can originate from the ego too. The intention sounds good, but is it pure? If you wish to be a saint because you love God, that would be fine. On the other hand, if you want to be a martyr, God may wish you to live a long life instead! Therefore, the best attitude to assume is to desire the Lord's will only – you just trust in him and accept whatever he wishes you to do or be. This is total obedience and abandonment, the perfect Christian way, simple and most beautiful.  

*To Be Restored to Perfection

        We may not be addicted to something as bad as gamboling or narcotic drugs, but we can be addicted to things such as cussing, getting impatient, fishing, golf, video games, etc. In general, I do believe that we are all addicted to my own ego and acquiring material goods. In other words, we are all shackled or enslaved to various degrees, one way or another. Here's where we need God to enter our life (heart) to free us from all our shackles. We need to be restored to the way we should be as God's perfect children. Since nothing is impossible with God, it's up to us to make it happen.

*Most Incredible Mercy

        Again, today is Friday and I prayed the Sorrowful Mysteries of the Rosary. I thought about Jesus who came into the world and got himself killed. Those who did it not just killed another human being, but unknowingly killed one who is the Lord God, our beloved creator! Jesus knew that this was going to happen to him, as he carried out the Father's plan of salvation for us. On the cross, he even prayed for those who put him to death – "Father, forgive them, they know not what they do." If they had repented, they would have been saved too. The mercy of our God is truly incredible!

*Bearing False Witness*

        In today's Gospel reading from Luke 11, Jesus drove out a demon that was mute and the mute man started to speak. Some in the the crowds falsely believed that it's by the power of Beelzebul, the prince of demons, that the Lord drove out demons. This reminds me of today's leftist main stream media and politicians who knowingly ignore the facts and keep on accusing falsely those on the right they do not tolerate. This is a clear violation of God's 8th Commandment: You shall not bear false witness against your neighbor. I pity those who keep on doing this relentlessly without repentance, for they doom themselves. 

**Our Big Folly*

        Communion time thoughts. Here's our living, eternal, holy God who is our creator and knows all about us. Here are also all of us, finite and sinful, who think that we'll do just fine on our own. Don't you see the utter folly of our posture? We are no better than those who crucified the Lord for whom he prayed on the cross, "Father, forgiven them, they know not what they do." We are a big bunch who does not know what we do either. (Note: Not all of us are like that – I am just trying to make my point.)

*How to Love Properly

        We all have concerns that place heavy burdens on our heart. Our most urgent prayers are usually said for family members who are dear to us. Then when I place my trust fully in the Lord, I see that he is truly the one to take care of everything, way beyond the people I pray for. In this way, I become detached from them. Of course, I still love them, but this love is now transferred onto the Lord God in charge. As a result, I feel peaceful with no unnecessary concerns anymore. I see that loving properly is to love with faith and in peace.

***Going the Only Way***

        In Deuteronomy 6.5: Moses tells the Israelites: "You shall love the LORD, your God, with your whole heart, and with your whole being, and with your whole strength. In Mark 12.30: Jesus says: "You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, with all your soul, with all your mind, and with all your strength." The only way for us to accomplish this is to surrender ourselves completely to God to become one with him. There is not another way! Once you've done it, you would be so happy that you did it, for now the Lord communicates directly with your heart. Without such a breakthrough, your spiritual progress will always be restrained.

***How to Be Free and Happy*

        Surrender yourself to God and do his will. This is the only way. And this is the simple truth. (This is how he has made us.)

Best Lenten Offering

        During this Lent, giving up something like eating chocolate cookies is good, but it's infinitely better to give up yourself to God so as to attain union with him. This positive approach will result in your becoming a saint for the rest of your life. With God, always go as far as you can for maximum security and enjoyment.

***Perfect Submission to God

        Communion experience. It should be a time of experiencing peace, but I felt that it's also a good time to let the Lord shake us up. Whatever God does to us can only be good for us. Therefore, remain completely passive to let him do whatever he wishes with you. 

***Living the Perfect Life

        Let the love of God reign in your heart so that everything you do will be motivated by him who is love. This happens when you let God increase to 100% and yourself decrease to zero. Then guess what, the Lord increases you to 100% in him! This is how he rewards us!

***Our Most Beloved Father

        Today's Gospel reading from Luke 15 was the well-known Parable of the Lost Son. All of us are sons and daughters of our heavenly Father. When we accept Jesus as our Savior, we are officially adopted by God. Can't you hear the Father calling each one of us "My son" or "My daughter"? How endearing he is to us! At the same time, we must realize how much we can hurt him if we sin against him, for he loves us so much.

*To Rein in Our Speeches

        We speak freely on our own most of the time, and when we are inspired by the Holy Spirit, we speak what the Lord prompts us to say. When speaking on our own, if we are not discerning enough, what comes out can be critical of others or even start an argument. This happened to me recently at a small group sharing. In responding to something someone said, I expressed my point of view and sounded as if I was criticizing the person. If Jesus were at this meeting, he probably wouldn't have minded at all. Afterwards, I realized that I still did not have enough humility in me. From now on, I want to say only what Jesus wants me to say or whatever meets his approval. Humility must rule and the ego never surface. More submission to the Lord is in order.

*Ultimate Spiritual Action

        God alone is more than sufficient for us. Once you have him, you can let everything else go. Therefore, the ultimate spiritual action to take is to dive deep into the Lord to remain in union with him. You fulfill all your desire and receive continual graces from him. This is living in the Lord, not just surviving on your own.

***Our Last Hope

        Today's Gospel reading from Luke 16 gave us the parable of the rich man and Lazarus. Both the rich man and poor Lazarus died; the former descended to the netherworld and the latter was carried away by angles to the bosom of Abraham. In torment, the rich man begged Abraham to send Lazarus to warn his five brothers still living lest they also end up in the place of torment. Abraham replied, "They have Moses and the prophets to listen to. If they will not listen to them, neither will they be persuaded if someone should rise from the dead." Now we have Jesus, the Son of God! If we won't even listen to him, we certainly banish our last hope of being saved. 

**Our Most Amazing Master!*

        In today's Gospel reading from Matthew 20, Jesus told the Twelve about his coming Passion, yet after the mother of the two sons of Zebedee, James and John, asked Jesus to make her two sons sit, one at his right and one at his left, in his kingdom, the other ten heard about it and became indignant at the two brothers. It just shows how far our thoughts and ways are from God's. Jesus summoned them and said to them, "Whoever wishes to be great among you shall be your servants; whoever wishes to be first among you shall be your slave. Just so, the Son of Man did not come to be served but to serve and to give his life as a ransom for many." Indeed, Jesus came and never lorded it over us nor made us feel his authority over us. This is the amazing fact: our God is our greatest servant!

**Devotion to God Alone

        Today is the Solemnity of St. Joseph. Many of us Catholics have great devotion to saints. My personal favorite saint is St. Thérèse of Lisieux whose spirituality is most attractive to me. At Mass, the Lord gave me these thoughts. Devotion to any saint is good as long as it draws us to him. That is, devotion to Christ must always be foremost. Likewise, miracles should always lead us to their producer. When we start chasing after miracles instead of God, we start going astray. I know all great saints are most humble beings and would rather remain hidden in God. Putting them on too high a pedestal would probably make them squirm. They'd rather we go to the Lord directly than through them. So my point is again to always go to the Lord first. If you happen to celebrate the Feast of some saint, don't focus upon the saint; rather, ask the saint to help you increase your devotion to Christ. We can live without the saints, but we can't without the Lord. 

**To Live in the Present

          I see so many people worrying about so many things in this world. At my age, most people I know are older folks and they are very much concerned about how they are going to be taken care of in the near future. This is a legitimate concern, but to worry about it is wrong, especially if you profess to be a Christian. I can quote from Matthew to show that Jesus does not want us to worry about tomorrow or about life, and if we seek the kingdom of God and his righteousness first, everything will be taken care of for us. But most people dismiss these sayings outright because they think you have to be pretty naive to believe in such easily made statements. What I want to say is if you really believe in them to the letter, you'll find that they speak the truth. What is needed is faith.

        Today I see clearly that God has a plan for me. He knows how much time I have left in this world and what he has in mind for me to accomplish if I continue following him. I myself only have an inkling of what I should do within the next year or so. Therefore, I do not worry about anything, knowing that God knows it all already. Should my inkling turn out to be off, that's fine too. We only need to do our best each moment and not be concerned about the next.

God's Light and Mercy

        I love feeling that as a disciple of Christ, I am constantly basking in his light and mercy. His light helps me see what he sees, the reality, and my own life and path so clearly. And his mercy draws me ever close to him and helps me love him and all others throughout my life.

*To Be Like the Father*

        Jesus had said, "Be perfect, just as your heavenly Father is perfect." In today's Gospel reading from Luke 6, Jesus said, "Be merciful, even as your Father is merciful." If you are perfect, you must be merciful too. Now, does being merciful make you perfect? If to be merciful is to be loving, then the answer is yes. For to be loving is to be like God who is perfect. So be merciful to all, do not judge anyone, and be concerned about their eternal life. Anyhow, be like the Father to become his favorite sons and daughters. 

**God to Be Experienced

        One watershed moment for the Christian is the moment he realizes that he is a sinner and needs Jesus as his Savior. He feels the Lord touching his soul definitively – usually an emotional experience he would always remember. Many Protestant brothers and sisters as well as myself who is a convert had it. The MS-13 gang members display this burst of emotions prominently in the video "God's Power of Conversion" I posted last Thursday. I have not encountered any cradle Catholics who talk about such a moment. I think it's because the question never came up for those who did not have to convert. Nevertheless, God should be experienced. If you remain open, the Lord will definitely make you aware of him. When I questioned him about us being the temple of the Holy Spirit, the gift of tears came to me unexpectedly. Of course, attaining union with the Lord is another big watershed. To experience God is to know him well and to love him.

***Ego, Our Worst Enemy

        The Lord made me see that ego is what keeps us from obeying him. It follows that ego is what prompts us to sin. Take a man who merely fantasizes and entertains impure thoughts – it's also the ego seeking self-gratification. The presence of ego shows the absence of humility. It is humility that frees us and ego that enslaves us. The path to God and heaven is clear. Seek union with God to rid yourself of ego to be perfect. 

**Ideal witnessing for the Lord

        Whenever we preach or witness to, or share with someone about Christ, we must be sure that we are promoting Christ and not ourselves. Sometimes you hear a great speaker and come away really impressed, but what you remember is the speaking and not so much the message. There are many homilies you hear from the pulpit that may be impressive, but fail to draw you deeper into the Lord. It's like listening to a pianist playing with great technical virtuosity, but not much feeling for the music. To be effective, we must live a hidden life in Christ with zero ego. Then let the Holy Spirit set our heart on fire so that the focus will be upon the Lord alone. 

***God's Power of Conversion

        As I have said, only God can fundamentally change a person. This short video shows how Jesus Christ had changed many MS-13 gang members. Praised be our Lord. Please pray for more conversions of them.

***Fast Way to Union With God

        One sure way of getting to know Jesus well is to talk to him whenever you can. Tell him everything on your mind and in your heart. Everything means everything, including things you wouldn't share with another human being. Keep doing this and receive the Holy Eucharist regularly and you'll reach union with God fast. (Naturally, you are expected to have all your sins removed by God first.)

*Be Prepared for Anything*

        I have planned on doing a few things for the coming months, then my wife had a new health issue and I realized that depending upon how it's going to turn out, I might have to scrap all my plans. I started thinking that I must be prepared for anything. Priorities must remain flexible, for all is in God's hands. If my plan doesn't work out, so be it. It's better to expect less and be surprised than expecting too much and be disappointed.
       The parable Jesus told at a dinner he was invited to in Luke 14 came to my mind. The Lord said to the invited guests and hosts, "When you are invited by someone to a wedding banquet, do not recline at table in the place of honor. A more distinguished guest than you may have been invited by him, and the host who invited both of you may approach you and say, 'Give your place to this man,' and you would proceed with embarrassment to take the lowest place. Rather, when you are invited, go and take the lowest place so that when the host comes to you he may say, 'My friend, more up to a higher position.' Then you will enjoy the esteem of your companions at the table." The bottom line: we should always remain humble – contrary to what the world teaches.

**Endearing Yourself to God

        In today's Gospel reading from Matthew 7, Jesus said to his disciples, "Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you." We as followers of the Lord do not knock on his door enough; it's as if we don't want to bother him too much. Let's realize that his riches are inexhaustible and he wants so much to give them to us. Not taking advantage of this is somewhat rejecting his love. In fact, it endears us to the Lord to be greedy for his offerings!

*Under God's Protection

        This early morning in a dreamy state, I sensed that the Lord was absolutely the one for us to follow. As a child, we always feel good when there is a big brother or sister or some adult whom we can trust and who is strong enough to protect us. Well, our God the Father is unquestionably the strongest of all and loves us the most. Therefore, if we trust in him and put ourselves totally in his hands, we'll absolutely be secure and not have to worry about anything. In this way, we also form the strongest possible bond with the Lord. Do not doubt what I have just stated; put all your faith in him first. 

*God Revealing Us to Ourselves

       Often we do something or feel a certain way, not aware of what the true motivation or the reason was. For example, in my own experience I once did something that made me feel unhappy. I went before the Lord and opened up my heart. He then revealed the hidden cause and I felt exhilaratingly liberated! Our God is the only one who can expose what's hidden or buried in our innermost, revealing us to ourselves. Again, I am most grateful and rejoice that we have such an understanding, loving Lord.

*God Can Make Us Clean!

         The feeling that you are clean, that your sins have been forgiven or taken away by God is one of the best feelings you can have. To preserve that feeling is to stop sinning. God is the one who can make us new, thus saving us! This is how he has made us and we should rejoice for that.

**Going Far With God*

        You see your sins and imperfections and sincerely wish to overcome them. It is possible that you spend your whole lifetime focusing upon this and end up merely maintaining your status quo. The excellent way is to aspire to become holy, looking beyond your present state and asking the Lord directly to make you a saint. Doing this and not dwelling on your woeful state will lift you to a higher state. There is absolutely no limit as to how far you can advance. Go positive and be on the offensive! Yes, get all the help from God you can to make everything easy for you – this is showing that your trust in and love your heavenly Father.

**Most Personal Lord

        Our God, the God of Christ the Lord, turns out to be the most loving Father and personal friend you can ever possibly have. He is the one who fulfills and completes our existence.

One Everlasting Relationship

        All relationships we have with other humans on earth will end, but my relationship with God once established will last for forever.

Learning From History

        Look at the history of mankind. So many people have come and gone. Those who believed and obeyed God went to heaven and those who didn't went to hell. We who are living are still marching on. Make sure now that you'll get to go where you want to go as you leave here.

*Happy Living

        Will you be happy about how you have lived your life if you were to leave this world right now? Happy is the person who is not concerned about what kind of things he has done or how much he has accomplished, but has followed the will of God all his life. He is ready to leave the world to receive his reward from the Lord.

How to Preserve Peace

        Let no one "bother" you except Christ, or mind no one except Christ.

Spiritually Stuck

        To recognize that Christ is Lord and Savior and that he can free us if we submit ourselves to him is not that hard. The hard part is to do the submitting part to make it all happen. This is the struggle we face. We then let the whole thing slide, and we are stuck and remain stagnant.

Serious Urgent Issue:

to accept Jesus as Lord and Savior or not in your lifetime.

*Only God Is Relevant!

        This thought came to me when I was about to fall sleep last night. We are supposed to get detached from everything and get attached to God alone. In that case, how people think of or treat us becomes irrelevant.

*"About" Is Not Good Enough

        To know about Jesus does not make you a Christian; you remain an outsider. To know Jesus makes you a Christian, putting you on the journey to heaven. It is also true that if you merely preach about Jesus, you won't change many hearts. But if you preach Jesus, you'll have the power to convert souls. Another example to show the difference. I attended a Bible study once and we studied a lot about the peripheral things instead of focusing upon Christ. As a result, I was not drawn any closer to the Lord through this course. To involve the heart, we must always focus upon the Lord himself.

***Take the Fast Track

        Again, seeking  spiritual guidance directly from Jesus is taking the fast track. If you go to another human being for guidance, he could be getting his guidance from another human being who is doing the same, and so on. This won't be effective in getting you up to the next level. Going to a saint can help, then you might as well go directly to God to whom all the saints go. St. Therese had a spiritual director first, but after she lost him, she headed straight for Jesus always. Your goal is to attain union with the Lord directly. Do this and you can safely skip reading my blog.

*Being Intolerant of Others

        If you cannot change yourself for the better, don't try to change others for (what you think is) the better. Once you see your own shortcomings, others' may not bother you anymore and the world will be a more peaceful place. Unfortunately, without turning to God, everyone thinks that he or she is pretty perfect.

Become Fire!

Fr. Mark Goring's latest 1-minute video. Amen.

*Most Serious Message

        In today's Gospel reading from Luke 9, Jesus said to all, "Whoever wishes to save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for my sake will save it. What profit is there for one to gain the whole world yet lose or forfeit himself?" Here Jesus was challenging us as the Lord again, if we cannot dismiss him as one who didn't know what he was talking about, we must take him most seriously, for our soul is at stake!

Closeness of Christ

          I woke up this morning at around 1:20 a.m. It was still all dark and quiet outside and I strongly sensed the closeness of Christ. I just poured out my heart to him and knew that he was taking care of everything for me. More joy of knowing the Lord!

*Biggest Problem We Face*

        What we must face is the reality of sin. We all know it, even though we don't like to think about it. Ignore our sinfulness is to face devastating consequences later. Jesus came to us precisely to show us how to free ourselves from sin so that we can make heaven. You have to be out of your mind to ignore him! 

**Appreciating God's Love

        It's Ash Wednesday today. We are to remember that we are dust and to dust we shall return. This is true, but I also know that Christ has changed me into golden dust, and I shall return to God my Father in heaven as his adopted son. What a difference the love of God can make to us! I love the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit. Glory be to them forever!

**No Repentance, No Salvation**

        With Lent starting on Ash Wednesday tomorrow, I wonder why so many people find it so hard to repent their sins. Even professed Christians do not do it as often as they should, which means that they are not always clean. To repent is such a joy, knowing that God is making you clean again. Once it becomes a habit, you'll find that you won't have peace until you repent. This is a wonderful blessing. Best of all, you please God the Father the most when you are clean. Repentance is a spiritual breakthrough, the key to salvation. Neglect repentance and you neglect your soul.

*Elementary Message

        You see, God wants you to go to heaven to be eternally happy, for he loves you. He's already cleared the way by sending his only Son Jesus to us. You know that you are a sinner and need help. And you know well that this world can never make you truly happy and that heaven would be the ideal destination. You've got all these things going for you; all you need to do is to let God the Father know that you are coming, and you'll be on your way. He will surely help you reach your goal if you follow him faithfully. I apologize if I spell things out as if you were all kindergarten kids. Just ignore me if you already know all this. But if I could reach just one person with this message, it would make at least two people very happy – that person and I. Naturally, God the Father would be overjoyed too.

**We Create Our Own Fears*

        Anyone who remains completely in the Lord becomes fearless, proving that all our fears are self-generated. How foolish we are!

Only One You Can Trust

        Since God is the only one you can entrust your soul to, he is the only one you can trust.

*Most Intimate Feeling

        Communion experience. I received the Holy Eucharist and knew that all barriers between Christ and me are gone – the Lord was completely open to me! I never felt that close to my God! Great joy filled me.

Letting God Power You or Not

        Is it hard to obey the Lord at all times? Is it easy to be holy? Of course, nothing is impossible with God, so how hard or easy would depend entirely upon how much you are open to the Lord. Submit yourself to God fully and you'll receive unlimited power. Life not powered by God is dull living at best, while life fully powered by the Holy Spirit is always exciting and uplifting.

**Be First and Remain First

        In today's Gospel reading from Mark 10, Jesus says to Peter that no one who has given up everything and followed him will not receiver a hundred times more now in this present age. He added, "But many that are first will be last, and the last will be first." I am thinking: why can't we be first at all times? The Lord makes me see that if we remain in union with him, we'll remain first always. 

*Focus Upon God a Bit

        If you are immersed in this life with attachment to so many things around you, chances are you don't even think about God. My suggestion is that you look beyond your immediate surroundings to focus upon the Lord, even for brief moments. If you hear him speak to you the slightest, this could be the beginning of a blessed new journey for you. The saddest thing is to cut yourself off from your creator completely who loves you so much.

***Always Acceptable to God

        I am sure everyone of us has been rejected for one thing or another in life. I've been rejected to join a team at school, to work at a company, to show my artwork at an exhibition, even to volunteer in a church ministry . . . . . But if you want to join God's family in heaven and belong to the Lord in totality, you will be welcomed to the hilt, for your Father in heaven, unlike any human beings, you yourself included, will never reject you. So go to him as you are and he'll take complete care of you, for all eternity to boot. 

Hardened Heart Warning

        We can die if our natural heart blocks the flow of blood, but a hardened heart that does not hear the voice of God is a lot worse, for it's a closed, judgmental heart, set to dismiss what might be the truth, thus placing the soul in great danger.

**Rewards Compared

        God rewards us for the good we do to others. Even hypocrites get rewarded, but their rewards are usually given for all to see and always short-lived. They are like perishable goods. The rewards you receive from the Lord in secret for doing good in secret are much better, for they do not inflate your ego nor expire. These are like treasures stored up in heaven which do not perish. 

*Keeping God Waiting

        God is always there, waiting for us. The walking away is always done by us, not the Lord. The good news is that you can instantly get back to him if you so wish. So stop playing games with him before your time runs out.

**Only Fear to Fear

        The only fear we need to fear is the fear that God is not with us.

**Excellent Arrangement

        Let Jesus own your heart and he will do the maintenance.

*Ask for the Best!

        We should feel free to ask God to give us the very best in every way, for he always wants the very best for us. This is a case of perfect understanding between two parties.

*Miraculous Union

        My last thought today. It amazes me that the love of Christ can affect us to the point of surrendering ourselves completely to him with joy. This comes about naturally as if God and we have always been looking for each other and the union becomes a perfect fit. It is truly miraculous. Again, I can only say that God has made us this way. If this hasn't happened to you, it's because you have not opened yourself fully to him yet.

No Complaining About Ourselves?

        Here is a thought. We complain to God when something bad happens to us, forgetting that we do bad things to the Lord all the time. Shouldn't we also complain to God about ourselves? I think if we repent, the Lord would be happy with us.

*Going to the Source

        If you want to experience love, freedom, peace, and joy, just enter the Lord God of Christ, for he is the source of them all. I am a living testifier. If you don't believe me, you can always find out for yourself.

*Breakthrough in Accepting Truth

        In today's Gospel reading from Mark 10, Jesus blessed the children and said to his disciples, "The Kingdom of God belongs to such as these. Amen, I say to you, whoever does not accept the Kingdom of God like a child will not enter it." I heard all this before, but today it came to me like a revelation, or perhaps more appropriately, a re-revelation. Naturally, I wouldn't be so naive as to accept everyone I come into contact in the world like a child, but if you are dealing with truth, you should and must believe like a child. And Christ is the only absolute truth out there! So I see accepting and believing in him wholeheartedly as a breakthrough! When you embrace truth like that, it itself is something very beautiful.

***Way to Live!

         A summary of what I've been trying to say all these blogging years: 

        

        We do what we can and let God do the rest. We let the Lord know everything and get him involved in everything. This shows that we trust in him. Basically, we let the Lord take over and we help him on the side, you might say, to accomplish his will. You no longer worry about anything, since you just follow. This is absolutely the way to live. But if you have trouble letting go, it's not for you yet. Seek to attain union with God (taking the fast track), then you'll be there.

*Settled for Eternity!

        Communion experience. Receiving the Lord is not like signing some contract to be with him for a certain period of time; it is to be bonded with him for all eternity! My future is settled forever – how can I not feel elated?