The first two persons of the Holy Trinity, Father and Son, I could comprehend, but what about the Holy Spirit? I was made to understand that the Spirit was already in me, but shouldn't I really feel something? I was not sure about this ~ it's a question for the Lord. Then He heard me. At that time, the Charismatic Renewal within the Church was spreading around the world. I was curious about it and asked a local priest to take me to a Charismatic Mass for leaders of the various prayer groups. Not long after Mass began, I started to weep tears of joy. This had never happened before and certainly not something I had expected or could have induced myself. The tears flowed continuously the whole time and I felt that I was being cleansed ~ I knew then that the Holy Spirit had given me the gift of tears.
I joined a charismatic prayer group and asked the entire group to pray over me for Baptism of the Holy Spirit. This was basically expressing your willingness to surrender to the Holy Spirit for him to work through you. You might say it's asking the Spirit to zap you. The result in almost every case was that Jesus became alive in the Gospels and a terrific desire to know him followed. Reading the scripture was such a joy and praying to God became spontaneous. You see, when God is drawing you to him, everything becomes easy. One person was freed from his addiction to watching sports on TV. I myself experienced an exuberant bubbly feeling in my upper body, which unbelievably went on day and night non-stop for three and a half months! The Lord continually filled my mind with spiritual thoughts and insights with no effort on my part. I was active in the renewal for over four years. Looking back, I can say that my growth in holiness in that period far exceeded the growth I experienced in all those previous decades.
A footnote. I came across the book Riding the Wind, written by Father George Montague. He experienced the same exuberant feeling I had after his Baptism in the Holy Spirit.
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