Our True Refuge

        During prayer before this morning's Mass, I felt that I could really trust Jesus.  I could go to him with anything, complaint or thanksgiving.  I could hug him, or just lean or rest on him.  

        Today's Gospel reading from Matthew is about the multiplication of the fish and loaves.  At the beginning, Jesus saw the vast crowd and was moved with pity for them.  Elsewhere in the Gospels, we learned that Jesus felt the sorrows of the people and was  moved with deep emotions.  This means that if you or I am in a miserable state, he knows and will take pity on us, we can be sure.  We can confidently put all our trust in him.

        Recently, a couple of my relatives were in deep misery because of what happened to their own children.  One is a Catholic who attends Mass regularly and the other is a Protestant fairly active in her church.  You talked to them to help, but the moment you suggested that they pray and trust in God for their burdens, they listened, then  continued right on with their sad stories ~ it's as if they wanted to remain in their state.  I guess they were so mired in their misery that they couldn't think of anything else, not even letting the Lord in to help.  What a pity! 

        We must learn to turn to the Lord at the first moment we feel distressed for whatever reason.  In fact, we should turn to him as often as possible, even when we are happy, so that the Lord indeed becomes our refuge.              

Immense Universe; Immense Love

        This link www.slideshare.net/Nubiagroup/english-astronomie-by-azartha takes you to a site that shows quite a number of space photos taken through the Hubble telescope in space.  There are nebulae and galaxies millions of light years away spotted.  Since light travels at a speed exceeding 186,000 miles a second, you can (cannot) imagine how far away these heavenly objects are.  Visualizing the immensity of the universe, we realize how "puny" we are; yet the Lord loves us to death.  Indeed, his love is even more amazing than his creations!  (Be sure to watch the images on full screen.)

Growing in Two Directions

        I went to the vigil Mass yesterday (because I like the music played at that Mass more).  During prayer before Mass started, the Lord showed me that I must grow in two directions, outward and inward.  The former refers to loving others and the latter, to becoming more humble.

        It's easy to feel a lot of love for the Lord, but to translate that into the action of loving others, which involves the will and requires effort, is another thing.  It's somewhat like an engineer who knows all the theory but doesn't know how to fix anything.  So I must grow outward in that direction.

        As for growing in the other direction, I must concentrate inward to gain more humility.  I had already ask the Lord to ground out my ego like a stump grinder working on a stump, but there are still remnants left.  So the work must continue.

        Love and humility must go hand in hand because either one lacking the other cannot truly be genuine. 

The Awareness Advantage

        Once I accepted Christ, the eternal life question was settled and the void of life, filled.  Now that I've known the Lord better, I see another advantage.  That is, I am starting to see the world through his eyes.  I see clearly what's truly important and what's not, what really matters and what's just wasting time.  I discern what's from God and what's not.  I understand more how God's ways are different from ours.  This awareness alone is worth the price of admission.    

Two Lives; Two Deaths

        Today is the memorial of St. Martha.  In the Gospel reading of John, Jesus told Martha, "I am the resurrection and the life: whoever believes in me, though he should die, will come to life; and whoever is alive and believes in me will never die."

        It's clear that there are two lives: the earthly life and the eternal life.  If one can never die after this life, then a second death is implied ~ that is the loss of eternal life.  Let's make sure that after we die, we'll have eternal life with the Lord and not eternal separation from him.  The first life and death are relatively unimportant, while the second life and death are of infinite importance. 

        The best way to take care of this matter is to love the Lord with all your heart, strength, and soul in this life.

Starve Your Ego

        One way to build up humility: After you have done a good deed, don't tell anyone about it.  Not only that, don't even think about it.  Know that every time you go through what you've done in you mind, you feed your ego.  And you want to starve your ego instead.

The Free Soul

        I didn't know what to blog today until after morning Mass. During prayer, the understanding of the free soul emerged in my mind.

        Most of us who are not quite free yet, get unhappy because we don't get our way or things just don't turn out the way we'd expected or wanted. A free soul no longer seeks her or his own will. S/he leaves everything up to God, seeking his will alone. Even in seeking God's will, s/he does not move until God shows the way. (You might say that waiting is the name of the game.) Since it's no longer our ways that matter, the heart is now free and untroubled. Pretty simple stuff really.

Reasons to Rejoice

        I rejoice today because I had been called by the Father.  Knowing Jesus has given me meaning to life.  I know why I am here and where I am going.  I have the Lord's example to follow and everything is on track.  There's nothing else in this world I need for fulfillment.  Only seeing Jesus in heaven will fulfill my longing for him.  Psalm 23 comes to my mind.  The soul is ready to fly to him the moment he calls.  It's my foremost daily prayer that all will be called to enter the fold of the Father.

       

No Losers

        I used to be a worse sinner.  Read St. Augustine's story and you see how he completely turned around.  If you are familiar with Fr. Corapi, he surely was a lost soul before the Lord got him.  Jesus truly loves sinners. 

        This leads me to think of the people who are unattractive, unkempt, annoying, or even obnoxious, the kind that normally turns others off.  The lesson to me is to never look down on any of them because they may one day be transformed by the Lord into saintly creatures. 

A Guideline on Not Sinning Badly

        If we sin and no one except the Lord knows about it, that's one thing.  But if our sinning is known to others and causes them to fall away from their faith, then it becomes a lot more serious.  We should never do anything that would drive others away from Christ and/or his Church.  Instead, we should always be like a shining beacon, drawing others to Christ.  (Remember that there are people who do not always think clearly.  If you don't behave as a Catholic, they put the blame on Christ and/or the whole Church.) 

True Body and Blood

        I happened to come across 1 Corinthians 10, 16 again.  As you know, many non-Catholic denominations believe that the bread and wine (or grape juice in their case) as offered by the Lord are only symbolic of his body and blood.  If it's true, tell me if Paul would have written the above-mentioned verse the way it is?

        The verse: "Is not the cup of blessing we bless a sharing in the blood of Christ?  And is not the bread we break a sharing in the body of Christ?" 

Thoughts on Praying

        Today's reading from Luke 11 at Mass contains the familiar "Ask and you shall receive; seek and you shall find; knock and it shall be opened to you."  Elsewhere, the Lord advised praying with persistence.  Obviously, God doesn't mind our twisting his arm a bit if we feel the need to do so.

        When Jesus was going through his agony before his crucifixion, he prayed if the cup could pass him by, yet at the end he said "Your will be done."  I think this is the model we should follow.  It is consistent with what Jesus teaches in the Our Father he gave us.  

        By the way, the saints, after having totally abandoned themselves to God, merely ask God to do whatever he wishes with them.  This is prayer at the highest level.     

Improving Humility

        Today someone praised me for something, and the Lord showed me that every time someone praises you, it is the perfect occasion to ask him to take your ego down a notch by giving you another dose of humility.  Hence, being praised turns into a blessing.  My afterthought was that if I start putting this advice into practice, a lot of praises may come my way.

A Faith Question

        Jesus said that if we have faith the size of a mustard seed, we can make a mountain move.  I am trying to understand that faith and how we can possess it.  If I see a bald person and ask him to let me pray for him and believe that he is going to start growing hair again ~ is this the right kind of faith?  I don't think so.  This seems to me more like a blind, presumptuous faith not directed by the Holy Spirit, unless God has already given me the gift of healing.  

        When we pray to God to heal someone who's sick, in the back of our mind we often wonder if the healing is going to happen.  But one time many years ago, when my own son was attacked by a virus causing his heart to almost stop beating and the doctors to consider a heart-transplant operation should he survive, I walked to his bedside in ICU, made the sign of the cross on his forehead pronouncing "Be healed in the name of the Father, and the Son, and the Holy Spirit" without hesitation, and he was discharged from the hospital four days later.  I said my prayer as if it was a command and afterward, did not even think about how God was going to answer me.  Looking  back, I do feel that my prayer was prompted by the Holy Spirit as it came out boldly and resolutely.  By the way, my son recovered completely in time.

        I remember when Peter was learning to walk on water, he started to sink the moment he took his eyes off Jesus, and the Lord chided him for having little faith.  So it seems that focusing our eyes on the Lord is a required condition.

        Last, we must acknowledge that we cannot create faith by forcing ourselves to believe, as faith is basically a gift from God.

        To obtain the kind of faith Jesus would like us to have, let's try to summarize.  We must (1) pray for the gift of faith, (2) be lead by the Holy Spirit to exercise this faith, and (3) focus on the Lord always to maintain this faith.  (One more thought: when we are at it, we might as well ask for faith the size of a water melon.)                       

Be Good Soil

        Today I heard the parable of the seed read at Mass.  To be good soil so that the seed will yield grain a hundred- or sixty- or thirtyfold, we must make sure that our soil is deep, not rocky nor compacted, and have no thorns growing on it.  This means that we must not harden our hearts but be receptive and attentive to God's words, and avoid associating with anything that may impede our spiritual progress. 

***Spiritual Progress

        Over the centuries, the stages of spiritual growth have been classified as the Purgative way, the Illuminative way, and the Unitive way.  St. Teresa of Avila further divided the journey into seven stages, which she called "mansions."  (Read Ralph Martin's book The Fulfillment of All Desire.)

        I'd like to look at the journey in a simpler way from a different point of view.  As you progress spiritually, imagine that you are traveling along a straight line. When you reach the point on the line that represents Total Surrender (TS) to God, you have finished the first part of the journey.  Beyond that point you have the next and last part of the journey.  Basically, you have a line divided into two parts.

        Many will not reach the point of TS in their lifetime.  On the other hand, we have saints such as Therese of Lisieux who got there in her young age (she died at the age of 24).  Spiritual progress is made as you travel along the road (line); but thorough, speedy transformations come only after you have gone beyond the TS point because God is now completely taking over.

        Today is the memorial of St. Mary Magdalene.  She was a great sinner, but because of her love for Jesus, she was transformed into a saint.  What we should do is not to be so concerned about whether we can reach or go beyond Total Surrender, but to concentrate more on loving the Lord as Mary Magdalene did and let Jesus lead us as far along the road of progress as he wishes.     

"Living" Your Faith

        The word that came into my mind during this morning's Mass is "live," as a verb used with an object.  When I pray the rosary, the Lord wants me to live the mysteries.  When I read the gospel, he wants me to live the story.  Similarly, if we have faith, we must not just hold or hide it ~ we must live it!  Yes, following the Lord is intense living.  Pray for this zeal in your spiritual life and you'll be very happy. 

How to Pray

        When you pray, take your time and mean what you say from the bottom of your heart.   After you have prayed, do not second-guess what God is going to do ~ just wait and let him surprise you.